We all have an inner child within us. Our inner child is the part of us that really embraces the joy of living life to the fullest. The problem is, as we move through childhood into adulthood our connection to our inner child is often weakened. This could be due to a number of factors such as the way we were raised or conditioned, the seriousness and demands of our jobs, financial pressures, relationship breakdowns, health concerns and raising a family to mention but a few. This does not apply to everyone but the vast majority of us would at least be able to recall some stage in our lives when we were not completely embracing life to the fullest and experiencing great happiness and joy. Here are a six ways we can go about reconnecting with our inner child.
(1) Let Go of the need to control others or situations.
This is a big one. We not only want to control our lives and the situations we encounter but also other people’s lives. This not only serves to disempower those whom we would like to control but disempowers ourselves because we haven’t come to the realisation that we cannot control another person or even a situation. We are powerless to do so and it’s exhausting – a complete waste of our energy. We only have control over our thoughts and actions. The more controlling we are, the more we are at odds with our inner child that accepts people and situations as they are and makes the best of the present moment. Letting go of the need to control others is choosing to free yourself from what could be a very disappointing and bitter road.
I have always been a person who likes to be on time. It was important in my family growing up and it is still important to me today. My husband however, is so much more relaxed about it all and if we are a couple of minutes late, we are a couple of minutes late … no one’s going to die!!! Anyway, I have struggled with this for quite a while. I would have myself organised, the kids organised and would be waiting for my husband to organise himself. Today, I am a lot more relaxed about it all because I can’t control him and I am only doing myself harm trying to. The same applies to our children. There is a difference between controlling them and guiding them. Anyway, what happens when we let go of wanting to control others is that they start taking responsibility for themselves and their actions. My husband is more punctual now that I have let go of the need for him to be on time. The psychology of it all is so interesting. What we resist definitely does persist. So LET GO of the need to control others or situations. It’s not about us changing others to suit ourselves but rather accepting others the way they are and looking within and changing ourselves.
(2) Get out in nature.
Nature is very calming and being within it can help remove the stresses of life or at least put them into perspective. We don’t need to travel far to be in nature, it’s all around us but we would benefit from really soaking it up a lot more; observing and admiring the plants and animals around us which have a magnificence of their own and are communicating to us whether we choose to believe it or not. Nature is always communicating to us. If you knew every blade of grass had its own angel, would you walk across it differently?
Get amongst nature and have some fun. When we do, we feel alive. We have more energy. We feel inspired. When you see the beauty in all living things life is magical.
(3) Music and Movement.
Music and movement can affect us physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. It helps us to release and express ourselves which is beneficial to our health and well-being.
Physically: We may dance, sing or tap our feet. A good beat moves us to rhythm. We may even be playing an instrument and feel a great sense of satisfaction and accomplishment.
Emotionally: We may feel happy, sad, inspired or some other emotion. We may be reminded of past memories or occasions.
Mentally: Music and movement can help change our moods and release tension.
Spiritually: Music and movement is so powerful it can and does engage our spirits. Musicals, orchestras, plays, musicians, dancers, circus performers and practices such as yoga and different forms of meditation all make use of music and movement. Whether we are performing or watching a performance, if we are enjoying ourselves, more than likely our souls are too.
Have some fun with it. Forget about what you look like, play some music and sing and dance like there’s no tomorrow. My kids love to have family discos, usually before bed. My son works the disco lights and the four of us are usually singing and dancing to something from the 80s. We all end up having fun!
(4) Have a good Laugh.
It is well known that laughter not only makes us feel good but has many health benefits. Laughter triggers the release of endorphins which are typically known as the “feel good” chemicals, into our blood stream. We feel happy, our stress levels are lowered, we are more relaxed, our pain threshold increases, our immune system strengthens and overall we feel a lot better for having a good laugh. Children generally laugh a lot more than adults do but it’s just as important for us to have a good laugh too and the more we laugh, the better. It’s a sign we are happy and our bodies function better when we are happy and we relate to those around us better too when we are happy.
(5) Play with your children.
The next time your child asks, ‘Can you play with me?’ don’t make an excuse. Go and play with them. It doesn’t have to be for long but it makes a huge difference to them.
The other day after school my daughter really wanted to go to the park and have a swing. I wasn’t feeling well, the weather looked ominous and I really just wanted to get the dinner cooked. Anyway, I took both of my children to the park. My son thanked me for taking them. He really enjoyed it even more than my daughter who was the one initially wanting to go. What I’ve learned is, once the moment has gone, it’s gone forever so make the best of each and every moment. If we are constantly delaying, we’re not engaging or playing.
(6) Schedule in some sanity time.
Time just for you and your partner to have dinner out (without constant interruption or telling your kids to eat with their mouths closed) or see a show or have some time alone to recharge and feel normal again, is important. We all need time away from our kids. It’s completely healthy and not only benefits us but our children too. Little breaks make a difference!
Wishing you all the best!
PS Would love to hear any comments you may have.